Ede Kane at the office

Sometimes I think I should rename this blog - I am never at The Party. I have had brief moments where I have flitted through The Party, but my life at The Party has been reduced to almost nothingness.

This is Ede Kane at the office.

What is it about crying? You can receive a super blow and hold your shit together but if someone opens their heart and asks you if you are okay, you lose your shit.

Why do we lose our shit when people love us, and we are able to hold it together in front of people who hate us? Isn't it the people we love - aren't they the ones we want to be strong for? Why am I holding my shit together for someone who hates me, and in all emotional logic - I should probably hate back?

And then at the end of the day the only real hating going on is hating of yourself and the only really loving going on is incomprehensible and intangible through all your self flagellation.

It's a mixed up, messed up world at the office.

I always wish I was back at The Party.

I looked at my pictures of Montmartre and I wish....